Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Decisions, Decisions

Ok, so here I sit calculating what my accrued vacation time will add up to at the end of the year, after subtracting days required for such things as, LACon, Westercon, and other such scifi cons, and what do I discover but that I will still have my full years allotment come December 31. And, if I don't use any vacation between then and the end of June 2007, I will have accrued the maximum amount I'm allowed before I start loosing it. Well, that's if nothing comes up between now and then to force me to use more than a day or two. I've never been in this position before--that of too much vacation time and nowhere to spend it.

So, what's a girl to do?

Well, I could make a few 3 day weekends into 4 day weekends and visit friends--I do get 2/20 off for Presidents Day, and, of course, there is Memorial Day. I could even turn a few normal weekends into 3 day weekends. Honestly though, the few friends that I have probably wouldn't put up with me visiting every few weeks for long. I can be a real trial on nerves, patience and tempers. Besides, it would only use up a handful of days, and I would just find myself facing the same problem a few weeks later than originally predicted.

Ok, I thought--yep, contrary to popular belief, I can think when I really want to :-) --what is it that I have always wanted to do more than anything else? Well, I mean, besides winning the Nobel prize in physics, becoming a best selling author, be an astronaut, become a well known musician/vocalist, be a National Geographic photographer, or a well known artist--I have a tendency to set my sites high, ok, very high. Oh, the musician and artist thing, well absolutely no talent, but a girl must have her dreams.

I know there's something else. What is it...what is it? Ah, that's it! I've always wanted to travel. Inside the states, outside the states, anywhere in the world, anywhere in the Universe. It didn't really matter where, because I just wanted to see everything. Some people don't understand why anyone would want to ever be more than a few miles from their home. I know, I have friends like this. They think I'm nuts. Of course, these same friends also told me I was abnormal and quite possibly insane simply because I do, and always have, get up somewhere around 3am in the morning.

Then there are others who, like me, have the travelling bug, but have definite destinations in mind--places they must see before they die. These friends have difficulty understanding why I don't. It's not that I don't, not really, it's just that for me the destinations, all but one, have always been driven by a whim. Each book I read, each movie I see, each song I hear can send me looking down another road, my curiosity sharpened and looking for yet another adventure to add to my ever growing list.

When I was very young, the importance of my heritage was drilled into me. Nothing new there. It happens in many families. I'm of German descent, so along with all the tales I was taught to believe that someday the wall would fall. Now, at the time, I had no idea what the wall was, or what it stood for, or even where it was. I was so young that my only concept of a wall that might fall was the one that Humpty Dumpty sat on. But still all the history and pride that my grandfather, parents and aunts drilled into me stayed, and with it grew a strong desire, a promise to myself that if I ever had the chance to travel outside the US the first place I would go would be Germany.

That chance came while I was in grad school. Would you believe I almost didn't go? I had teaching responsibilities that I couldn't leave unattended, and there is no such thing as a substitute teacher in grad school. Well, ok there is, but that would be the professor's grad student, which was me. I got lucky though. A couple of my professors offered to take my classes for me. I guess they really liked me given the lectures I received about not missing out on the opportunity. They practically packed my bags for me. On the other hand, maybe they were just hoping to get rid of me.

So off I went to see the sites of Germany for two entire weeks. And see them I did, though not as many as I might have if I hadn't had to spend time huddled in my hotel room working on my thesis as well. I didn't make it all the way north to Ahaus to visit my cousins, but I did have the shock of seeing my father's face beneath a Roman helmet--ancient graffiti etched into the walls of a gate in Trier. And I was there when the wall began to fall. An event I thought I would never see in my life time. I'm still sorry my grandfather didn't live long enough to see it.

Nothing in my life will ever be able to top that one short trip, so well timed by the fates. And yet, I have not lost the desire to traverse the globe.

Last year I went to Scotland. After being idle for so long, Interaction (Worldcon 2005) gave me a handy excuse. I tried to skip across the water to Ireland too, but didn't quite make it. And now the bug has been reinforced--it's not one you can build up an immunity to. So here I sit trying to hone down an endless list of possible destinations for my next vacation. Where will I go? What will I do? Will I be alone, or will I be graced with the company of a friend?

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